Abuse of drugs, alcohol, and self occur simultaneously as he relapses in his loss of faith.
lyrics
I am currently tokin' loud
Because in silence I often find that I'm overwhelmed...
I'm chasin' demons with a 40-ounce
I heard the devil can't swim so I pour to drown
You're lookin' at me as if I'm important now
Maybe intoxication is the secret to being needed I take another couple grams to the face heavily weeded I speak an ocean's deepness to a shallow lake
I often find solace in my shadows wake because it's hard to find mistakes when I'm not awake I need a spa I need to rest I need a break I see a girl she needs a bra I need some head she needs a taste I'M AWAKE
But that don't mean I wanna be I see my worst nightmares
masturbating in front of me taking pleasure through watching me grow weaker with these hauntings I don't breathe
Only hold my breath or toke weed and I don't eat only drink the stuff to make me want sleep I don't see
All I do is feel and I don't speak because I'm so misunderstood that speech is moot to me
Cut myself just to see what's up but it's usually nothin' but blood don't feel pain just woozy from too many shots and too many doobies from loose leaves
Rollin’ wit dem papers like loose-leaf got true speech I'm not suicidal I just sometimes like to abuse me
Need somethin' reckless to lose myself in, somethin' precious to destroy
I'm trekkin' through da void with a couple chicks big dick in a small pond dem broads wetter than some koi - fish
Limitless images in my mind accompanied by voices I like to think that I'm normal but
Pretty colors just disguise the deadness inside I am coral bruh
I hate to think about this sorta stuff n' so I take bong hits and pour a cup
Funny how I use a bong pipe to breathe when swimmin' through
liquor seas that's intoxicated snorkel stuff
Let the bud burn slow I like to torture blunts as a tortured soul with a twisted sense of self I must...have a had a little bit too much
Closing:
I musta had a little too much
I guess...I must've drank a little bit too much
I musta smoked a little too much have a had a little too much
I musta had a little too much
Perhaps this whole living thing’s been overdone
Maybe this whole living thing has been overdone